Last week, my wife told me she’s leaving me, and I’m really struggling to figure out what to do next. We bought our house in 2020 when rates were at 3%, so our current payment is around $1,650 a month. Since then, property values in our area have skyrocketed. We owe about $230,000 on the mortgage, and similar homes in the neighborhood are selling for nearly double that.
Here’s where I’m stuck: I can’t afford to buy her out outright, and she makes significantly more money than I do—maybe 2-3 times what I earn. I did make the original down payment from the sale of my previous home, but we had to put both our names on the mortgage to get approved.
I’m completely lost and have never dealt with anything like this before. Is there any way I can keep my current mortgage rate and payment? Do I need to refinance at what I currently owe plus her equity? Should I consider a home equity line of credit?
I’m supposed to meet with a lender in a few hours, but my mind is all over the place right now, and I’m terrified I’m not only losing my marriage but also my home. Will appreciate any advice or insight
Hi there,
To keep the house, consider negotiating in the divorce settlement by offering other assets, buying out your spouse’s share, or refinancing the mortgage in your name. Consulting with a divorce attorney is essential for personalized legal advice.
It’s a tough situation, but you might explore refinancing options to adjust the mortgage or potentially secure a home equity line of credit. Given your financial challenges, consult with a financial advisor and legal expert to understand your options for retaining your home and managing the equity split with your wife.
I’m really sorry to hear that you’re going through this, and it’s understandable to feel overwhelmed with everything happening at once. Keeping your current mortgage rate and payment while resolving the equity situation with your wife is challenging but not impossible. One option is refinancing the mortgage to buy out her share, though, as you mentioned, this might mean taking on a larger loan, which could come with a higher interest rate given today’s market conditions. If refinancing isn’t feasible, you might consider a home equity line of credit (HELOC) to cover her equity portion, which could allow you to maintain your current mortgage terms while giving her the cash she needs. Meeting with a lender is a good step, but it might also be helpful to consult a financial advisor or a real estate attorney who can guide you through the specifics of your situation, especially regarding protecting your interests in the down payment you originally made. No matter what, try to take things one step at a time, and remember that you’re not alone in this—seeking professional guidance will help you navigate this difficult time.
One partner might offer to buy the other out of the mortgage during a divorce. If you can’t afford to keep the house, consider asking for spousal support or refinancing the mortgage.
